Unpopular opinion time, but it has to be said and I, Connie Troverse, am always glad to be the rabble-rouser to say it.
Kelis, Rihanna, fictional Nasir’s baby-momma from Love Is, stop putting your hands on these men.
DO BETTER!
This week, Nas released a 7-part letter to Kelis in response to the statements she has made about him being physically and verbally abusive and just not a good partner. When I heard the story from Kelis, I was ready to never listen to another Nas album ever again- not that I listen often, but If I Ruled The World is my CUT!
But then I read Nas’s Instagram and felt it necessary to write a public service announcement to my sisters.
Men are taught from childhood:
You don’t hit girls.
You don’t hit women.
It doesn’t matter what they do to you. You don’t put your hands on a woman
Ever!
That is true, guys. It’s true that boys should never hit girls. But are said girls taught not to hit boys? Are they taught to control their physical and verbal outbursts? Who out there believes that since he “isn’t supposed to hit you,” you can behave any old kind of way? And if he loses his mind and puts his hands on you, is he still all of the way wrong? I’m not sure that he is. Okay, he IS WRONG, but so is she.
For clarity, I do not believe it is right to hit women. No part of me thinks that is okay. HOWEVER, I also don’t think that that fact gives women the right to lay unholy hands on a man and not expect consequences and repercussions.
Chris Brown is another one…
I dismissed as an artist and stand-up human being after his physical altercation with Rihanna went public. Then I listened to his YouTube account of the situation and heard his reports of her pushing and provoking him physically. Don’t dish what you can’t take, sis. He was still wrong, but so was she.
And although Love Is displays a fictional recount of events, that scene in Love Is when Nasir’s momma, played by the amazing Loretta Divine, had to stop Nasir from putting his hands on his son’s mother after she proceeded to hit and push and muff Nasir into a closed and ready fist was extremely powerful and thought-provoking.
Oh, and if you still haven’t binged this show, you are officially sleeping! #LoveIsOwn
But I digress.
In conclusion,
You don’t have to love me, but that doesn’t give me the right to put my hands on you. Women, keep your hands to yourself. For his safety and yours.
Sincerely,
Connie Troverse #ISaidIt
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